I am addicted to connecting with people.

The new Built to Spill album is exceptional. Exceptional.

I'm going to get a box fan to put in front of my window and point it away from me so I can send the delicious smell of cheeseburgers away from me and so I will stop walking over there to eat. I swear that those cheeseburgers are made of candy. They may be one of the best things in the world as Paul knows it.

I don't know if I want Union Board to be my life.

posted by paul @ 10:40 PM

I want to be the guy that people are glad to know. I need to start letting people be themselves.

Last night I slept in a Mexican hammock under the same stars I watched so long this January on Alexandro's roof.

We make so many promises to ourselves about the people we're going to be, what we're going to read, and the places we're going to see. Spending this summer in Shreveport, while breaking one such promise, is not a nail in my casket. Things change. Setting goals and making plans is a sign of being alive. Don't ever stop making those promises. This summer, no matter where I am, I'm going on a road trip to places I've never been. I promise.

posted by paul @ 8:11 PM

Dear Ndugu,

I am afraid of being alone. Fear makes normal events more interesting. A walk to the County Market used to be a routine deal, now that we have to worry about armed robbery, the trip across the street is an adventure. Tonight, I was alone. It was a good time. It was an adventure.

About Shmidt was everything O'Neal ever told us, just like O'Neal said it would be. I'm going to start reading again. I wonder what would be a good book after not reading for two and a half years. My life is a constant struggle to seem better rounded. This is where the pun about me being such a square goes.

Truly yours,
PK

posted by paul @ 1:55 AM

There is a certain valor in not doing things you aren't good at. It's painful when we can't see what those things are.

I love Scrubs. Also, cooking.

Also, Adam's mom said I could pass for gay. There are things we wish we could take back. We've all got them. Being able to let stuff slide is one of the most attractive qualities anyone could have. I don't need to know every time that I hurt you, I'd rather not think about it, I'd rather not have to keep score. Treat your life as if you were behind in the count and that you may never get back on top. That's the best a friend can be.

posted by paul @ 12:23 AM

Awwwww shucks.

And then I get three enthusiatic thank-you emails for pulling a 20 minute photoshop job at work. Nobody ever hated being appreciated.

It's a good feeling when you use something you made. It's alot like using something you inherited or that was given to you. The point is, it's stronger than if you bought it, and you can't really inherit things on-demand. So, if you want a serious rocking chair, you need to build one. And what a rocking chair it's going to be.

posted by paul @ 4:50 PM

This project is my last piece of pro bono design work. I've done my time, I've gotten good at something, now it's time to get paid for it or move on and get good at something else. There is a great deal of grey area between being a friend and being used. I think it has something to do with the face they give you right after they ask. Why do we excel at things? Do I need to be used? Does that make me feel like a badass when people ask me to help them out? Maybe it does, I'm ok with thinking that I'm somewhat to blame. I'm ok with feeling like a badass.

posted by paul @ 11:16 PM

Breaking up is hard to do.

I want to be forced to build a friend network from scratch. I want to move far away and have to fashion weekend plans out of a Friday newspaper and a short list of phone numbers.

I'm the only person in my house that's single. This would have bothered me a year ago, but now it's about as big of a deal as the age discrepency. Happiness and confidence are where you make them.

posted by paul @ 7:23 PM

After 21 years, I am still not a hat person.

If first impressions were always made by a resume, I would pass out sheets of paper towel or the Ruston Daily Leader. Hello, my name's Paul, and as you can see by this sheet of paper, I am as boring as hell, and half as qualified.

Jack White's new band launched their website, quality tracks.

I hope my next house is not next to a fast food establishment. My bank account info is half McDonalds debits. I am an American.

posted by paul @ 1:53 AM

Jack Johnson covers We're Going to be Friends on the Curious George Soundtrack. What a perfect idea. Yes, Jack, OK, you win, we can be friends.

Tonight I told the girl at Super 1 to "Have a good time getting off." I'm not even sure how those words made it through mouth customs, but they got out of the country and into the land holycrapthisisawkward in a hurry.

posted by paul @ 12:42 AM

I've been thinking. The other day I saw two guys with ties on bicycles and I thought. I hoped that we're all who we should be.

This page is going to have 100% more capitalization and punctuation from here on out. And less whining, emotional is so 2004.

Top 5 albums?
Neutral Milk Hotel - In an Aeroplane Over the Sea
Built to Spill - Perfect From Now On
Pavement - Crooked Rain, Crooked Rain
Kings of Leon - Aha Shake Heartbreak
New Pornographers - Twin Cinema

Life is a process, you can't regret who you were. Keep notes, check your stride, and take confidence from the fact that you think you know what you're doing and who you are. Meeting people is the easiest thing in the world.

posted by paul @ 11:54 PM